Birthday Cakes, Not Wedding Cakes

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Picture this: You have finally worked up the courage to tell your parents that you are gay. Today is the day and despite all the homophobic side comments and dodged questions about dating, you are finally going to do it. You are shaking, tears well up in your eyes, and your throat starts to close as you force out two words: “I’m gay.”’

It does not go well. Your parents kick you out of the house and say you are no child of theirs. Disowned, beaten down, and broken, you call up a friend and ask to stay over for the night, and they have a couch for you. You were lucky enough to keep the keys to your car, and you drive over to spend the night. You keep doing this for a month, different friends each time, until you finally end up just living in your car.

This is a recognizable picture for 640,000 LGBTQ youth in the United States, or approximately 40 percent of the 1.6 million young Americans who experience homelessness. It is perhaps the most daunting of the many issues that confront LGBTQ youth today; others include forced conversion therapy and high rates of suicide.

But these are not the issues that contemporary politics focuses on. Instead, marriage equality and the fight against religious exemptions have recently captured the public eye. Today, causes like the Equality Act are addressing some of the real challenges within the adult LGBTQ community, but youth are left to fend for themselves, whether on a friend’s couch or in a session of conversion therapy.

Instead of receiving help from Washington, LGBTQ youth are forced to rely on other institutions to support them. Nonprofit organizations like the Ali Forney CenterIowa Safe Schools, and The Trevor Project are helping to reduce the impact and prevalence of youth homelessness, as well as of inequality in schools and disproportionately high suicide rates. But they get little assistance from political parties, presidential candidates, and lawmakers.

The LGBTQ youth community needs action, not just allyship. Political leaders need to put in the work at the top of our system, just as grassroots groups have been doing at the bottom. Direct services mean nothing if these issues are not being addressed systemically. Many Democratic political leaders pay only lip service to LGBTQ issues; rather than constantly referring to their voting records, the Equality Act, and token shows of support, they should work to be strong advocates for new policies that can save the lives of LGBTQ youth.

A Community in Crisis

“Kedarie Johnson, a 16-year-old black, genderqueer youth in Burlington, Iowa was murdered in the middle of a school week,” recounted Nate Monson, executive director of Iowa Safe Schools, in an interview with the HPR. “And the kid was shot multiple times, tortured, had bleach poured on them, and left for dead because of their gender identity. And you know what happened? Nothing. Nothing happened.”

Beyond high rates of homelessness, LGBTQ youth are also at greater risk for hate crimes and suicide. Furthermore, they also face unique challenges like conversion therapy because of their sexuality. While LGBTQ Americans have made great strides over the past decade, more needs to be done, and LGBTQ youth are especially in need of active allies.

“I am so tired of us talking about wedding cakes when we have to get kids to their next birthday cakes,” said Monson. “We talk about people being able to get married and wedding cakes in these religious exemption bills. There are LGBTQ students still contemplating suicide because they are being bullied, discriminated against, and treated like shit. And that’s it. We are really talking about someone getting married when we have kids that are dying?”

Monson’s frustration is well-founded. While the data for LGBTQ-related hate crimes is often unreliable and underestimate the prevalence of anti-LGBTQ crimes, a report from the FBI notes that overall, hate crimes increased by 17 percent from 2016 to 2017. Monson also mentioned teen suicide: a report from the U.S. Centers for Disease Control and Prevention confirms that  “suicide was higher among gay, lesbian, and bisexual students (42.8 percent) than heterosexual students (14.8 percent).”

These numbers back up Monson’s anecdotes and reinforce the message that most politicians  have not acknowledged: Despite the gains made by LGBTQ Americans, LGBTQ youth are still at risk.

Legislative Limitations

In 2011, ‘Don’t Ask, Don’t Tell’ was repealed. In 2013, the Supreme Court ruled in favor of same-sex marriage. In 2019, the House of Representatives voted to block President Trump’s discriminatory transgender military ban. In the past, politicians have been an active force for progress for LGBTQ Americans. Today, politicians — and especially the 2020 Democratic candidates — must step up to the plate again.

Too often, politicians take the safe road on LGBTQ issues to the detriment of LGBTQ youth. The hot-button issue of the day is the Equality Act, which would prohibit discrimination based on sexual orientation and gender identity in places of public accommodation. While important for LGBTQ rights across the board, supporting this bill seemingly gives Congresspeople an excuse not to co-sponsor other bills which pertain directly to the safety of youth.

Consider the “Protecting LGBTQ Youth Act,” introduced by Sen. Tim Kaine (D-Va.). The Act would add language to the Child Abuse Prevention and Treatment Act specifically protecting LGBTQ youth from abuse. It also calls for more research on how to protect LGBTQ youth from abuse, trains personnel to meet the needs of LGBTQ youth, and adds categories on sexual orientation and gender identity to child abuse reports. While the Equality Act is supported by all Democratic members of the Senate, Kaine’s bill is co-sponsored by only one other senator. Similarly, 240 House Democrats co-sponsor the Equality Act, while only 88 co-sponsor an act to essentially ban conversion therapy across the country.

These numbers are not meant to criticize the Equality Act, but they do point out that this allyship only extends so far. Legal protections are incredibly important, but youth need extra attention, and there are simple, common-sense solutions available to Congress — should it choose to consider them.

For many queer youth, school does not provide the support systems they need. According to a 2015 report from the CDC, “LGB students were 140 percent more likely to not go to school … because of safety concerns, compared with heterosexual students,” and “nearly one third (29 percent) of LGB youth had attempted suicide at least once in the prior year compared to six percent of heterosexual youth.” The Student Non-Discrimination Act would provide legal protections specifically for LGBTQ students in an effort to curb these haunting statistics. However, the bill was only introduced in 2018, with no additional action taken. It has yet to be introduced to the 116th Congress.

Now consider homeless LGBTQ youth. Six hundred and forty thousand homeless LGBTQ youth is far too high a number. In response, Congress could include queer youth in the Runaway and Homeless Youth Act. This would mean incorporating nondiscrimination language, recording better data on queer youth, and changing the grant applicants to include queer youth in their planning documents. When queer youth make up 40 percent of the homeless population, it should be expected that legislation on youth homelessness specifically mentions them.  Currently, it does not.

Waiting for legislators to pass laws is unreliable, and queer youth need support systems now. Nonprofit organizations are forced to fill this void, providing services to homeless LGBTQ students or support for LGBTQ affinity groups in schools. These organizations will always be necessary, but there is no denying that new laws could lessen the burden on them. The ball is clearly in Congress’ court.

The Ask

A rapid increase in American acceptance of the LGBTQ community has masked the challenges that the queer community faces, and sexuality and gender identity are oftentimes still taboo. As Harvard professor of studies in women, gender and sexuality Michael Bronski explained, “[Queer youth] are experiencing the same problems as in the ‘60s, ‘70s and ‘80s. We live in a country that still has the debate about whether sex education is okay for public schools … [or where] a children’s book in which someone has two mommies is seen as being controversial to read to third-graders.”

For queer youth, the legislative strides taken toward acceptance of marriage equality for LGBTQ adults have not translated into improvements in their everyday lives. Today, reliable support comes from nonprofit organizations while Congress and the DNC continue to provide allyship rather than action. Democratic candidates, Congresspeople, and other political leaders need to do two things: listen to queer youth and take action on their issues.

Why the need to focus on queer youth specifically? Monson put it perfectly: “Youth overall take a backseat in America, primarily because of not being able to vote. Youth don’t have a lobbyist up there like the oil industry and other corporations.” When political leaders do take action for the LGBTQ community, it is often just for people within their voter — or donor — pools. Queer youth do not receive the same kind of attention from political leaders that queer adults do.

Joshua Dantzler, director of social media at Student Voice, a student-run nonprofit that empowers students to take action on issues that impact them, told the HPR in an interview that political leaders should “listen to queer youth not just once, but multiple times over multiple conversations.” However, oftentimes “queer youth are afraid to speak up, afraid to be the ones to start up a conversation.” This creates a cycle that is hard to escape: LGBTQ youth want to be heard, but are afraid to reach out.

For a demographic that often experiences some of the greatest hardships in the LGBTQ community — homelessness, suicide, hate crimes, and conversion therapy — queer youth are far too often ignored. It is dangerous and reckless to cater to voter and donor pools when youth experience greater risk. If the government does not protect queer youth today, they may never reap the benefits progressive policy has achieved for LGBTQ adults.

Image Credit: unsplash/Annie Spratt