Standing Alone, Together

“That sometimes human beings have to just sit in one place, and, like, hurt.”
-David Foster Wallace, Infinite Jest
There are often small gatherings around Harvard to just hurt, in that sacred way that people hurt when there is nothing else to do. When what’s done is done and what’s left do is unclear, sometimes we just have to sit. But sometimes we stand; we stand and hurt and talk and yell about it, until it hurts less and until what’s left to do is clearer.
When a group of about 150 students gathered outside of Massachusetts Hall, it was clear that mental health issues were not unique to one group of students: not one race or gender, socioeconomic class or major. We all feel it, from time to time, whether it’s personal anxiety from classes or a friend dealing with serious disease. These issues are human, and seeking help is human. That’s why we were there.
After every tragedy Harvard’s student body gets the same email, horrifying in its familiarity.
 
“It is with great sorrow that I write to inform you of the tragic passing of a member of the Harvard College community.” “There was no indication of foul play.” “If you’re struggling with grief or stress, please take advantage of the College’s extensive mental health resources.” “There will be a gathering [ ], in [ ] at [ ] for friends and members of the community to come together and support each other as we remember [ ].” “Please join me in mourning [ ]’s passing.” “Our thoughts and prayers are with you and [ ]’s family in this sad and difficult time.”
“[…]”
“Sincerely”
 
The email header is always “Sad news,” as if that can really describe what kind of news it is. I’d really love to get a “Sad News” email saying that the renovation of the Science Center plaza is behind schedule, or that Yard Fest is cancelled. That would be sad news, not this: not students forced to take year-long leaves of absence without support or direction. Not weeks of waiting time before seeing a doctor. Not maximums on psychotherapist visitation under the school insurance plan. Not a suicide rate of 24.24 per 100,000 students. That’s not sad news, it’s much more.
It’s hard to believe anyone in Harvard’s administration is really satisfied with our record as a  university and as a family. This isn’t who we are, and it’s hard to believe anyone is content with how things are going. Why, then, does nothing seem to change in the face of growing student frustration? We don’t have an answer yet, but we stood and hurt and talked and yelled trying to remind “them” – anyone, ourselves maybe – that we expect an answer. Sometimes we just have to sit and hurt, but we should never sit for long. Eventually we have to act.